Back At It

Well we made it through my first week back to work.  The hardest part is now behind us.  We now know how our mornings will work, Dean has settled into his routine at the babysitters, Kaci is back to her full time pre-school grind, and Kevin has settled into his Mr. Mom role from 4:00 p.m. - 5:30 p.m.  So how has it been going you ask?

The challenges:

• Dean wakes up early...as in 5:00 a.m. most mornings.  He wakes up starving...so I feed him.  My rule is if it's before 6:00 a.m., he has to go back to bed...so back in his bed he goes.  He usually goes right back to sleep, but by now it is 5:20 a.m. and my alarm is set to go off at 5:30 a.m. so that I can shower before Kevin.  So I am up...for the day...a half hour before I wanted to.  
• Kaci is rather fragile in the mornings.  I have to make sure I give her plenty of time to relax a bit on the couch before we head out the door.  Try to rush her and you are guaranteed an emotional breakdown.  
• Traffic still sucks.
• I lost my mentor at work.  He didn't die or anything so don't shed a tear...He moved on to bigger things.

On the bright side:

• Mornings are not chaotic at all with Dean's ridiculously early start time.  I leave the house feeling calm and organized.  In fact, I even cleaned my bathroom Friday morning before work.  Now that has never happened in this house before.
• I must burn more calories waking up so early...right?
• I love my job...always have.  It feels really good to be back at it.  I am very excited to get home to see my little gremlins though.
• Being at work again brings back my appreciation for the weekends.
• The radio in my car can again be cranked loud during my drives.

Dean has hit the 3 month mark and is just a prince.  Handsome as ever...want to see?

And Kaci is a wild girl who is just as adorable as ever.  She can now snap...she wanted to make sure I added that tidbit to the blog.  Here is my gal relaxing with a beauty mask...the grimace is due to her worry that the peppermint was burning her skin:

Adios for now!

Boot Camp

Nope, not a bad ass athletic conditioning boot camp to get me bikini ready by Memorial Day.  No need for that, it's going to rain anyways.  Instead, this boot camp focused on sleep training.  Specifically, nap training for my handsome son.  You see, Dean did not like to nap unless he was sleeping on me.  I got pretty relax and just kind of went with it.  Hey, there are worse things than having to sit on the couch and cuddle with him every couple of hours.  But it was time to face reality.  Dean needed to learn to nap on a schedule, in his crib, alone.  Shit.

As I sit here and reflect on the past few weeks, my initial thought is that I can't believe I waited so long to do this.  Doing so left me scrambling to get it done before I have to go back to work, which only escalated my stress.  Second, I am thankful that I only have 8 followers of my blog.  I am sure that none of you guys will feel the need to post any comments about how barbaric and inhumane my training tactics are...right?  Good, glad we got that settled.  Shall we move on to the nitty gritty of my boot camp?

HOW: The progressive-waiting approach -  At the first sign of sleepiness I would swaddle Dean up tight, pop in his binky and put him in his crib.  If he started crying I would go in, pop the binky back in, and calm him down by rubbing his forehead.  From then on I would gradually increase the amount of time before I would go in to calm him down.  The goal being for Dean to learn how to put himself to sleep.  For an example, here is what Day 1 looked like:

First check - immediately

Second check - 3 minutes

Third check - 5 minutes

Subsequent checks - 10 minute increments until either he fell asleep or the designated nap period was over.

CHALLENGES:

The crying - Duh...listening to your child cry sucks.  

Self doubt - After he cries through an entire designated nap period, you really start to doubt that what you are doing is beneficial.  "It will never work!"  "He is going to hate me!"  "All this screaming must be causing permanent damage to his vocal cords!"  Oh and any google search you do on the topic will turn up haters that will confirm all of your negative thoughts.  

3 year olds - Kaci can't do anything quietly.  

Sacrifices -  Consistency is key, which means staying home is what needs to happen.  So no, you can't go have a beer with your brother at his new house on moving day.  Nap time!  No heading out to the mall when the urge for new jeans hits.  Nap time!  Oh you usually drop your kid off at preschool at 9:00 a.m.?  Not if that is during nap time.  Nope, she goes in late.

So where are we now?  I can now comfortably say that Dean no longer cries through the designated napping period.  In fact, most times he goes down pretty dang easy.  I have also come to realize that he is a 45 minute napper.  Almost to the minute.  I will take it though, as these naps result in a much happier little man.  We will continue to work on things, but I do feel like the hardest part of the sleep training process is over.  Thank God.   

Well, better wrap this up.  Time to enjoy my last evening of maternity leave.  Tomorrow I head back to the grind.  Bring it on Monday...bring it on.

From The Mouths Of Babes

Have you ever met one of those people that is just constantly pronouncing or using words wrong?  I love them and find their errors amusing.  If you ever find yourself feeling a little bit cynical, seek out someone like that.  You will be smiling after that conversation...I guarantee it.  

My go-to person no longer works with me.  Luckily, while I am hunting for a replacement, I have Kaci to fill in.  For your entertainment, I thought I would share a little.

****

Kaci: "Mom, Dean has throw up on his lindsey."

Me: "His what?"

Kaci: "I SAID Dean has throw up on his lindsey." (very irritated at this point)

Me: "It's called a onesie Kaci."

Kaci: "Well o.k. then!"  (still irritated)

****

Kevin: "Kaci, do you want a hamburger or hot dog for dinner?"

Kaci: "A hot dog.  Only a rotten hot dog though."

Kevin: "What?"

Kaci: "I only want a rotten hot dog Daddy."

Me: "I think she means raw."

****

(while wearing her new favorite shirt - pictured at left)

Kaci: "When I grow up, I am going to get really big maracas right Mom?"

Me: "Really big whats?"  (not quite sure where this is headed)

Kaci: "MARACAS!"  (points to the moccasins on her shirt)

Me: "Oh you mean moccasins."

Kaci: "Yep, that's what I said."

As for this little guy?  We are all looking forward to hearing the thoughts that run through his head.   

Framily

Framily - this basically describes my weekend.  No, I am not talking about the latest and greatest cell phone plan.  I think this about sums it up:

Family or Framily...either fits

Kaci, Dean and I took a trip over the mountain to spend the weekend at Prineville with the whole crew.  Lots of FRAMILY, a little sunshine, and some adult beverages for those of age.  Not many words are in my head today.  I think my mind is still on my mini-vacation.  So a photo essay will be the format for today.

Dean got some quality time with Aunt Crystal, Uncle Jake, Grandma and Rowan.

Took advantage of the sun and went on a few walks.  Kaci required many breaks.

Dean on one of his rare naps not being held in someone's arms.  More on that little issue in a later post.

And a trip into the big city of Prineville, OR.  The new Dooms Day prepper store was a must see.  And of course we had to get our growlers filled with some delicious beer.

Kaci opted to stay at the house to  work on her swing.

And no vacation is complete without some hammock time.

That is it for now.  Thanks for reading!

2 Month Stats

Wow...what a whirl wind these past two months have been.  It really does go by fast.

Growing like a weed.  

2 month fun facts:

• Weight - 12 lbs 11 oz 
• Height - 2' 0.5" (95th percentile!)
• Likes include sleeping at night (thank God), flashing smiles at all the girls (me being his favorite of course) and his Ergo Baby.
• Dislikes include ???  Now I know you guys are probably thinking "Hey bi-polar Betty...what about your previous sob story post?"  Well the thing is that he really doesn't dislike anything in particular.  He just dislikes EVERYTHING if he is overly tired.  I really have to keep a close eye on his napping situation, making sure that he gets enough sleep during the day.  He still displays some crankiness, but we can deal with that.  We have realized that he is just a bit more sensitive to things than Kaci ever was.
• And yes, if I were asked to describe his hair color at this stage, I would have to admit that "ginger" may be an accurate description.

Kaci is still liking the job of big sister.  Very inquisitive, some new questions include: "Where is Baby Dean?"; "Aren't you going to bring Baby Dean with you?"; "What about Baby Dean?".  Thanks Kaci!  Not sure I could handle this motherhood thing without you!

Loves to jump in bed with Dean each morning

Just one more month and then I am back to work.  I will soak up every last second being at home, but do have to admit that the thought of going back to work does excite me.  Not the work so much, but the people.  Though I do wish that 10 to 2 was the schedule instead of 8 to 5.  If anyone can offer me this, with a salary match of course, give me a call!   

This Too Shall Pass...Right?

If I were asked to describe myself in 5 words, my first word would be routine.  Say it with me now....ROUTINE.  Don't you love how it rolls off of your tongue?  Other words that come to mind include plan and goal.  Uptight you may be thinking...actually no.  Oddly enough I do not think that this word even remotely describes me.

Now, let's move on to my blood pressure.  It is low.  Want to spike that though?  Throw a wrench in my routine, mess up my plan, divert me from reaching my goal.  A huge reaction...of course not.  I choose to internalize my problems.  Duh.  I realize that this is probably not the healthiest route to take.  I may be years, hell even months, away from my Walter White-esque mental breakdown.  (Yes I finished Breaking Bad.  Yes I loved it.)

Where am I going with this?  Well Dean is throwing a wrench as hard as his 2 month old arm can.  So sweet and handsome, he really is high maintenance.  Feeding issues, napping issues and a lot of crying is what has been filling my days.  It's hard.  This is due in part...o.k. a big part...to the fact that I can not take things day by day.  Like really can not do it.  My mind jumps days, weeks and months down the road.  Take this trip with me:

• Does this unraveling of his daytime routine spell the demise of him sleeping through the night?
• Can I regrow my tooth enamel that I am grinding down each and every afternoon?
• Is Kaci destined to a life of crime due to all of the extra t.v. time she is getting while I deal with her brother?
• Will anyone be able to give him the smiles and hugs that he deserves when I go back to work if he continues to be so cranky? 

Shit...each morning I turn over a new leaf.  I resolve to live in the now and take it one day at a time.  I hope for a little less of this:

And a lot more of this:

This took me a long time to write.  I hate discussing my short falls.  And that is exactly what I see this as being.  Dean's fussiness and such is really not the problem.  It is me and my inability to deal with the situation.  I am not the one calling the shots here, Dean is.  But I believe that the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem.  

Serenity now folks, serenity now.  This too shall pass.

Hands Free Device

This is a post about how the Ergo Baby changed my life.  No really it did.  I was on my way to becoming the Hunch Back of Notre Dame's twin sister with my old infant carrier.  Not a good look or feel for me.

The carrier I was using was an Infantino.  I bought it when Kaci was born.  I never really put it to much use.  Having Dean though, along with a wild 3 year old, I do find that I need to have my hands free.  Well I quickly found that my old carrier was garbage.  My back would ache after just 15 minutes of strapping my little Dean Bean on.

The Ergo Baby is what I went with.  It cost a pretty penny, but I found that it was well worth it.  Aside from the fact that it doesn't hurt my back, it also has a large zipper pocket.  My old carrier had one teeny, tiny pocket with no zipper.  So small that it would not even hold a binky.  Useless!  This new carrier is also much easier to put on.

Sorry son, these hands are needed for other activities!

Dean taking a peek around

 As an added bonus, it boasts the ability to carry a 4 year old toddler weighing up to 48 lbs.  Ummm, why would anyone need to carry their 4 year old in a pack for extended periods of time?  Attachment parenting at it's finest?  Probably not for me.  But I figured I had better make sure my carrier was not defective.

Don't get used to this Kaci!

It should be noted that even Kaci was embarrassed about this photo.  She would like me to remind everyone that she is not a baby.  It should also be noted that this is the second time that Kevin's Women In Waders calendar makes an appearance on my blog.